A fine romance (Dorothy Fields / Jerome Kern)
 
A fine romance, with no kisses
A fine romance, my friend this is
We should be like a couple of hot tomatoes
But you're as cold as yesterday's mashed potatoes
A fine romance, you won't nestle
A fine romance, you won't wrestle
I might as well play bridge
With my old maid aunt
I haven't got a chance
This is a fine romance

A fine romance, my good fellow
You take romance, I'll take jello
You're calmer than the seals
In the Arctic Ocean
At least they flap their fins
To express emotion
A fine romance with no quarrels
With no insults and all morals
I've never mussed the crease
In your blue serge pants
I never get the chance
This is a fine romance
I have two versions of this but neither of them are by Lena Horne. The first
one is from a songbook and the second's transcribed from a recording by Bing
and Dixie Lee Crosby.

A Fine Romance
- words by Dorothy Fields, music by Jerome Kern
- from the movie "Swing Time" starring Ginger Rogers and Fred Astaire

WOMAN'S VERSES:
 A fine romance with no kisses!
 A fine romance, my friend, this is!
 We should be like a couple of hot tomatoes
 But you're as cold as yesterday's mashed potatoes

 A fine romance, you won't nestle
 A fine romance, you won't wrestle
 I might as well play bridge with my old maid aunts
 I haven't got a chance, this is a fine romance!

 A fine romance, my good fellow!
 You take romance, I'll take Jello!
 You're calmer than the seals in the Arctic Ocean
 At least they flap their fins to express emotion

 A fine romance with no quarrels
 With no insults and all morals
 I've never mussed the crease in your blue serge pants
 I never get the chance, this is a fine romance!

MAN'S VERSES:
 A fine romance with no kisses!
 A fine romance, my friend, this is!
 We two should be like clams in a dish of chowder
 But we just fizz like parts of a Seidlitz powder

 A fine romance with no clinches
 A fine romance with no pinches
 You're just as hard to land as the Ile de France!
 I haven't got a chance, this is a fine romance!

 A fine romance, my dear Duchess!
 Two old fogies who need crutches!
 True love should have the thrills that a healthy crime has
 We don't have half the thrills that The March of Time has!

 A fine romance, my good woman
 My strong, aged-in-the-wood woman!
 You never give the orchids I send a glance
 No, you like cactus plants, this is a fine romance!

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A Fine Romance
- words by Dorothy Fields, music by Jerome Kern
- lyrics as recorded in Los Angeles August 19, 1936 by Bing
  and Dixie Lee Crosby

A fine romance with no kisses
A fine romance, my friend, this is
We should be like a couple of hot tomatoes (to-mah-toes, dear)
But you're as cold as yesterday's mashed po-tah-toes (potatoes)

A fine romance, you won't nestle
A fine romance, you won't even wrestle
You've never mussed the crease in my blue serge pants
You never take a chance, this is a fine romance

A fine romance, my good fellow
You take romance, I'll take Jello
You're calmer than the seals in the Arctic Ocean
At least they flap their fins to express emotion

A fine romance, my dear Duchess
Two old fogies, we really need crutches
You're just as hard to land as the Ile de France! (Fronce)
I haven't got a chonce (chance), this is a fine romance

A fine romance, my good woman
My strong, aged-in-the-wood woman
You never give those orchids I send a glance
They're just like cactus plants, (oh boy)
This is a fine romance!